(This post is a rough draft. For finished, polished posts, might I reccommend (see how I spelled "recommend" incorrectly? I may not even have time to go back and fix that!) one of the "Popular Posts" in the box on the right. A handful of folks were particularly not bored by "5 Tricks to Get Your Toddler to Do What You Want)
So, I missed the boy's birthday update that I was so diligent about the first year of his life. Missed it like I've missed it for maybe a year now.
Because who celebrates monthly birthdays? It's confusing for the kid AND the parent.
So here are a few things, mostly for my own record, of what he's been doing these days:
Boy is 2 years, 4 months and change...here are some things he's doing:
Likes to say:
Most recently:
"NB play trumpet, make daddy laugh."
"NB poo on daddy! NB pee on daddy! NB poo on carpet. NB pee on carpet!" He doesn't do any of these things, but he only says them when he isn't wearing a diaper, and sometimes has snuck up behind Daddy and wrapped him in a pants-less hug. I think he just likes to see the raised eyebrow expression I give him. So, I need to work on not reacting to SOMEONE SAYING THEY'RE GOING TO POO OR PEE ON YOU!
When asked where to go: "Go to the Japanese market!"
"Daddy, play ABCs. NB play Twinkle Twinkle." Not sure if he knows these are the same song, but he puts them together.
Other:
Counts to 13, but then skips to 16 or 17. Goes on to 30, with slight assistance.
Says the letters of the alphabet, but skips N. (Who needs it, anyway?)
Tip toes.
Walks "slowly."
(Most of the time is running, so these variations are interesting...to his parents, only...)
Ate 6 raw oysters a few weeks ago.
Ate intestine cold dish apetizer yesterday.
Eats shrimp like it's running out of style.
There's a lot more, but it's breakfast time..
-ND
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
Monday, May 23, 2016
5 Tricks to Get the Toddler to Do What You Want
As Baby Boy turns into Toddler Boy, communication between him and his Not-Quite-As-New Parents slowly shifts.
The old tricks* of "here are my car keys, jingle jingle," don't necessarily work. (Although sometimes it still does! God bless the "keys" trick!)
So, for parents like us going through this transition, here are five new tricks to use on that baby slowly turning into a kid.
I didn't make all these tricks up, but I definitely use them all. Every day.
Sometimes they work. And other times, like last night, baby boy runs around with his diaper off yelling, "I pee and poo on carpet, I pee and poo on carpet!"
Seriously.
1. Which of these two things do you want to do?
Give your toddler two options, both of which lead to your desired outcome.
Example: Instead of, "Do you want to go to the car?" Ask, "Which shoes do you want to wear to the car: the orange shoes, or the yellow shoes?"
Success Rate: 95%
Side Note: My internet provider also uses this trick on me. Why? Because it works. You get stuck thinking about the options presented in front of you, and it's hard to think about an alternative. (Maybe I DON'T need internet at the house! Maybe I should get together with my neighbor and share!)
Now that I think about it, my bank, credit card company, and wife also use this trick. That's because it's a good one.
2. Yes, you can do that, but later.
Instead of saying, "No," let your toddler know that of course they can go outside and play in the mud, but just, not right now because it's dinnertime. Later, though. No problem.
Success Rate: 80%
Why this works: Toddlers don't like to hear "no." And most of them time, they forget about "later." I'm not saying they live in the present and don't have a sense of the future...but.. Actually, I am saying that.
Why this doesn't always work: Sometimes they don't forget. Especially if "later" involves ice cream.
Bonus: I've heard parents are able to use this to get kids to do chores, such as, "Yes, you can do that, but not until your toys are picked up." Those parent's are fucking amazing.
3. That's for adults only.
I don't know if this works for everyone, but when we tell baby boy that something is "for adults only," with a serious look, he respects that.
Example: Of course you can't drink Daddy's coffee, that's for "adults only."
This can also apply to anything you don't want messed up, such as any drawer or cupboard or closet or anything he can get his damn hands...
Success Rate: 70%
I am aware the phrase, "Adults Only," is used a different manner in the "adult" world. But I swear, when you say it to your kid, it's sounds really innocent...and definitely not like a sign on the side of a gentleman's club.
4. Uh oh, Mommy's leaving, quick, let's...
New Mom often leaves for work first. The boy knows that he only has a certain amount of time to do things with her in the morning, so if he wants to brush his teeth with mamma, well, now's the time! Go go go!
Success Rate: 60%
5. Daddy is doing X and it's the the most goddamn fun thing in the world...
Also known as the Huckleberry Finn trick, this one takes commitment. Any hesitation, and the game is up. So break out that inner Meryl Streep and dig in.
Example: "Wow, putting on my shoes is amazing! Left foot slides right in, oh my gosh that feels so cool!"
Yeah, that sounds a little lame when I write it out. But as I've learned as parent, don't judge until you try it.
Success Rate: 25-75% (Depending on your inner Streep.)
And...
That's all I've got. Hopefully those help!
Got any tricks you use? Let me know and when I have another 5, I'll create another list.
Lastly, I'm always a little hesitant to write about parenting "things that work." Because now, there is a 25% chance that I've jinxed all these tricks, and we're back to square one.
And I'd rather not be in square one. There's a lot of crying in square one.
Not to mention, pee and poo.
Seriously.
-ND
----
* Maybe "trick" is the wrong word.**
** Maybe it isn't.
The old tricks* of "here are my car keys, jingle jingle," don't necessarily work. (Although sometimes it still does! God bless the "keys" trick!)
So, for parents like us going through this transition, here are five new tricks to use on that baby slowly turning into a kid.
I didn't make all these tricks up, but I definitely use them all. Every day.
Sometimes they work. And other times, like last night, baby boy runs around with his diaper off yelling, "I pee and poo on carpet, I pee and poo on carpet!"
Seriously.
5 Tricks to Get the Toddler to Do What You Want
1. Which of these two things do you want to do?
Give your toddler two options, both of which lead to your desired outcome.
Example: Instead of, "Do you want to go to the car?" Ask, "Which shoes do you want to wear to the car: the orange shoes, or the yellow shoes?"
Success Rate: 95%
Side Note: My internet provider also uses this trick on me. Why? Because it works. You get stuck thinking about the options presented in front of you, and it's hard to think about an alternative. (Maybe I DON'T need internet at the house! Maybe I should get together with my neighbor and share!)
Now that I think about it, my bank, credit card company, and wife also use this trick. That's because it's a good one.
2. Yes, you can do that, but later.
Instead of saying, "No," let your toddler know that of course they can go outside and play in the mud, but just, not right now because it's dinnertime. Later, though. No problem.
Success Rate: 80%
Why this works: Toddlers don't like to hear "no." And most of them time, they forget about "later." I'm not saying they live in the present and don't have a sense of the future...but.. Actually, I am saying that.
Why this doesn't always work: Sometimes they don't forget. Especially if "later" involves ice cream.
Bonus: I've heard parents are able to use this to get kids to do chores, such as, "Yes, you can do that, but not until your toys are picked up." Those parent's are fucking amazing.
3. That's for adults only.
I don't know if this works for everyone, but when we tell baby boy that something is "for adults only," with a serious look, he respects that.
Example: Of course you can't drink Daddy's coffee, that's for "adults only."
This can also apply to anything you don't want messed up, such as any drawer or cupboard or closet or anything he can get his damn hands...
Success Rate: 70%
I am aware the phrase, "Adults Only," is used a different manner in the "adult" world. But I swear, when you say it to your kid, it's sounds really innocent...and definitely not like a sign on the side of a gentleman's club.
4. Uh oh, Mommy's leaving, quick, let's...
New Mom often leaves for work first. The boy knows that he only has a certain amount of time to do things with her in the morning, so if he wants to brush his teeth with mamma, well, now's the time! Go go go!
Success Rate: 60%
5. Daddy is doing X and it's the the most goddamn fun thing in the world...
Also known as the Huckleberry Finn trick, this one takes commitment. Any hesitation, and the game is up. So break out that inner Meryl Streep and dig in.
Example: "Wow, putting on my shoes is amazing! Left foot slides right in, oh my gosh that feels so cool!"
Yeah, that sounds a little lame when I write it out. But as I've learned as parent, don't judge until you try it.
Success Rate: 25-75% (Depending on your inner Streep.)
And...
That's all I've got. Hopefully those help!
Got any tricks you use? Let me know and when I have another 5, I'll create another list.
Lastly, I'm always a little hesitant to write about parenting "things that work." Because now, there is a 25% chance that I've jinxed all these tricks, and we're back to square one.
And I'd rather not be in square one. There's a lot of crying in square one.
Not to mention, pee and poo.
Seriously.
-ND
----
* Maybe "trick" is the wrong word.**
** Maybe it isn't.
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